The thrill is gone?
I mean why am I so relaxed, quiet, not excited? Did I miss something? What a weird feeling 😐
I remember my previous journeys to USA and Argentina, the anticipation prior departures. I could scream of joy and excitement. You could literally read it on my face. Why am I looking like nothing special gonna happen in 3 days? Isn’t it my most desired and crazy dream to come true? Am I missing something very important?
I’ve been told the countdown was too long. My journey was so super present in conversations with friends in past 18 months. Or my be it is the loss of my dad in October dropping a huge shadow on my feelings. I’ve mentally cancelled my dream journey every night since summer, when I learned about his cancer in final stage. Daddy, I miss you a lot!
What if despite everything I just had enough time to prepare? I don’t have the usual before-vacation-horror-stress at work, got zero stress with any other preparation, the backpacks are packed, the backups are done, all arranged, all looks good to me. And the most important: I managed to sublet my apartment just in time. I moved out of my home by the 1st of December, which shifted the “deadline” for all preparations for 2 weeks earlier as the actual departure is. This gave me the chance to focus on my projects at work and on my people to say goodbye. While I was testing the living out of suitcase in my extremely comfortable temporar home (my friends Reinhard and Clara hosted me, many thanks to you guys!), I could slow down myself from the exhausting past weeks. Couldn’t make it better.
So what is departure with no stress is possible? What if I did everything right?
This very final countdown…
It feels so great right now and a bit weird at the same time…